Hi,my dad is dyig from stomach cancer(and it has spread)?
my momis is in her 70s right now(and her memory is on the frritz) is not listen to the advice the docs or nurses give.i find pills adjectives over the house on the floor in random places. my da hasnt eat in 3 days and tonite he said he felt close to he had a rash :( my mom ignore it and says hes fine. he doesnt even.last time she did that i call the nurse and told her what was going on with my dad that morning.when i got to the house the nurse approached me and said it was a angelic that i called.my dad had an infection(as resourcefully as a high temp(my mom was pissed1 and told the nurse not to listen to me or give the name me anymore..but what if i did . a few days later my dad complained of pain within his foot.i took them to the er and lo and behold he had gout in his foot.(for 2 days my mom unseen it!! uuugh!! she even picked his pain meds..yet again he is sick and immediately has a rash. my mom have it in her head that he is not dying. can i call upon the doctor with my concerns?) i too am his caretaker. sorry so long
Answer: If you love someone, your responsibilities become unlimited. So, considering you are adult and independent, you should do what your heart tell you to. You won't regret it.
Are there any close relatives/ family friends whom you could walk to?
All the best!.
I'd call the Dr. Your mom isn't doing anything to help him.. somebody have to. Since you are his caretaker it falls on you. Even if you weren't, you're still his daughter. You'll just have to develope a tough stormy skin to deal with your mom human being pissed. After your dad dies I'd let some other sibling deal near your mom. You'll have done your share. Best of luck. I would definitely voice your concerns near his doctor. He
has cancer and before long he is going to be within constant
pain and if your mom is ignoring his discomfort very soon.
Its just not good he probably desires to be placed in a home
or hospital so that someone can constantly look in on him
and see what he requirements and how he is doing. I know it is
very hard to matter with and it is very despondent that your other
siblings aren't doing anything to help. My dad had adeno
lung cancer and it ravage his body very quickly..
You are a wonderful daughter and it is a shame it is adjectives put on your shoulders. It is typical of people today they just do not contemplation enough.I will send my restorative thoughts to you even though we live in different country,s.Be proud what you have done to give support to your parents at least you can sleep at night.
I will i could do more to help but i am sure there are a few ethnic group on here that can send healing out close to me.
It is so wonderful that your father has you in his natural life. You will truely be at peace with yourself knowing that you did all you could to gross his last moments comfortable and memorable. I assume you should talk to your fathers doctor just about your concerns and see what he thinks you should do. Have you considered assisted living?? Its not the same as nursing home, they deeply live on their own but they have night nurses on duty if they necessitate them. Good luck and God Bless!! I too had a parent who was dying from metastatic cancer. It is so difficult sometimes for everyone around the character to cope with the reality of the situation. There be times that I was the one in denial...even though I am a nurse. You stipulation to coordinate with the nurse and/or physician and express to them your concerns. They should totally understand your mom's denial at this point surrounded by time, and should value your input. The ultimate objective for him at this point is to make him comfortable..
If you dont think your moms fit plenty to look after him get help, but be within for both of them, dont give up, it sounds like you are battle with your mom, you should sit down and talk next to her about the whole situation and how to proceed next to your dads best interest at heart, sounds like your moms struggling to come to terms next to the possibility of losing her partner. you don't say where you live...if you live here surrounded by the US, you can call elder services in your town and inform them what your mother is doing (or not doing) and let THEM handle it. You probably own a full life, it's better to get pro's to run care of your parents. (tell your Moms Dr and your Dad's Dr what's going on in their house...they call for some help)
If you don't live in the US, I'm sure theres something in the country where on earth you live thats listed or get some minister to from your parents Dr's there too...
As someone said it depends on where you live. If you live within a country with good community trouble and organisations you should try and contact the doctor in charge and explain the situation.
They should have social workers who can aid you out. Being a carer is a very stressful and demanding role. You need to win as much help as is available. You are effectively caring for both your mum and dad. The nurse sounds similar to she has a good relationship beside you? Maybe you should ask for her help, she will help attain you going in the right direction.
Its important to realise that in attendance are people and organisations out there who are at hand to help. It is just a situation of getting in contact with them surrounded by your local area.
Good luck and make to look after yourself and do things you wallow in!.
It seems that you don't manage to call in your parents regularly if your Dad hadn't eaten for three days on one occasion, could you look in on a daily basis formulate sure dad gets a meal and take his medication.
As both parents are elderly perhaps Mum isn't capable of looking after him, could you return with help from the council, home help for instance.
It might be a suitable idea to visit his doctor and voice your concerns, the doctor may be capable of help, also you will find out exactly how ill he is to be capable of explain it rationally to your Mum, also the doctor may visit him more regularly if he realizes there are problems at home